Wednesday, 18 August 2010

Politically Correct Sacrifice.



"PRAISE SATAN, SACRIFICE BITCHES, PRAISE SATAN, SACRIFICE BITCHES, SACRIFICE BITCHES FOR SATAN YO. and smoke crack"
excerpt from a notorious BIG song that you haven't heard but does exist.

Whilst we agree with Mr Smalls when he puts forth his argument for worshipping Lucifer, we are in two minds about the latter half of his advice. And we certainly don't agree with the language he uses to describe the fairer sex. Its the 21st century now, not the 16th and women's place in society is equal to men's if not greater. As such the role of sacrificial victim is far beneath them, they're doing shit like being bank women and police women and lawyer women.

But sacrifices do need to be made, however it is possible to do this without resorting to sexism. You can do this by ensuring that everybody gets involved in the process and that everybody dies.
Not just the unfortunate female.

As ever, we provide a pictoral guide to show you how. Because you are useless cunts and need our help with everything apparently.

THE START

1. Find some slammin' chick who is damp for the Antichrist.

2. Try and light some candles. Fail because you are on a beach and its windy as a pair of tits.


3. Pose with the candles instead. Because fuck you is why.
"Maybe you won't be able to see that they're candles in the photo and we can say that they're Satan sticks or something?"
Yeah too late for that now.


4. Choke yourselves with the candles, think Satanic thoughts. Place the upside down cross somewhere suggestive.

5. Die.

THE END

We're dead. How'd you like us now?
As such, from now on I will only refer to 'us' in the past tense. I've not worked out how yet though.

Many thanks to our Lady of Lucifer JMC for choosing to end her life in such a degrading way with us (in the past).

NEXT WEEK; COMMITTING CRIME IN WALES - IS IT POSSIBLE?

1 comment:

  1. w0w I guess disposable cameras r pretty kool!

    ReplyDelete